


better together

by helloshepard



Series: what we owe to each other [7]
Category: Marvel, Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Bodysharing, Codependency, Developing Relationship, Dreams and Nightmares, Eddie Brock Takes Care of Venom Symbiote, Gentle Kissing, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Night Terrors, Nonverbal Communication, Sleep Paralysis, Telepathy, Venom Symbiote Takes Care of Eddie Brock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-08
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-08-20 12:01:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16555370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helloshepard/pseuds/helloshepard
Summary: “We’re both losers, but we’re partners, Venom.” Eddie says. “I knew that when you came back.”I know.Venom leans into the touch, moves forward until his teeth are grazing Eddie’s lips.You are my loser. Completely and entirely.Eddie tilts his head forward, pressing a kiss to Venom’s jaw. Venom forms shoulders, then arms and hands that clutch Eddie’s waist like a lifeline.(or, five times Eddie and Venom figure each other out, and the one time they don’t need to)





	better together

**Author's Note:**

>   
> I listened to Guiding Light by Mumford & Sons while writing this. On repeat. For several hours. I'm in the process of making a soft symbrock playlist.

1.

Eddie is relatively certain Venom is sulking.

He never feels Venom’s moods and thoughts as intensely as his own; instead, it’s a muted reaction, all blurred colors and emotions and images always half a second too late, half a step out of sync. Eddie isn’t sure if it’s __supposed__ to be like that, if it’s a symptom of some kind of alien incompatibility, or if it’s some kind of defensive measure his brain has cooked up. Venom remained vague on the topic whenever Eddie asks, all evasiveness and noncommittal responses.

So he thinks it as hard as he can at Venom as he ladles a portion of chicken soup into a bowl.

 ** **I am not sulking.**** Venom says, and Eddie believes him.Venom doesn’t make a habit of letting his annoyance fester--and Eddie appreciates that. Eddie fills up another bowl and carries both to the couch. It’s easier to eat soup at the table, but Venom watches more television than anyone Eddie had ever met. And he _likes_ it too, watching everything from sitcoms to Animal Planet with equal interest.  ** **Hungry.****

“That’s what the food’s for, bud.” Eddie settles on the lumpy, stained couch. Venom extends a tendril to grab the remote, and Eddie flicks it on. “What do you wanna watch?”

 ** **You have never done this before,**** Venom says. His thoughts are murky, intentions blurred.

“Done what?”

A tendril gestures to the bowls.

“Hey, I’m no cook, but even I can manage soup out of a can!” Eddie protests, taking a sip of the warm broth. Not bad, actually. Maybe he __was__ a cook.

 ** **You brought out two,**** Venom finally says, after a moment of frustrated silence. ****You have never given me a separate eating dish before.****

“Sorry?” Eddie isn’t sure if this is a good or bad thing, but now he’s feeling Venom shrinking into his stomach until all that’s left is a sharp pinprick of shame. “I didn’t know that was a cultural no-no for you guys.”

 ** **It is not.**** Venom says. ****You take care of us. I do not know how to reciprocate.****

Eddie is quiet. He can feel Venom absorbing his thought process, drinking in the neurochemicals and memories that give him context for reaching decisions. And when Venom shrinks back even further, and Eddie knows he’s hit on the answer.

“This has never happened to you before.” Eddie says aloud, though he does not need to. “That goes out of their way to care of you.”

Venom cannot lie, because while Eddie is not in Venom’s head as much as Venom is in Eddie’s, Eddie knows a lie when he hears it, and that goes double when you feel the shame pressing down on your skull.

 ** **Yes.**** Venom admits.  **Yes.**

 

2.

So then, because Eddie is Eddie, Eddie goes out of his way to buy things for Venom. Nothing huge and outlandish, because Venom really has no concept of price and value outside of what he’s picked up from Eddie’s brain, but _stuff._

It’s intensely uncomfortable the first ten times, awkward the next fifteen. Venom vacillates over accepting a bag of chocolate from Mrs. Chen, and the stress of it has Eddie breaking out the next day.

And because Eddie is Eddie, he persists. Once Venom is comfortable enough receiving food and touristy knicknacks, once Venom stops flinching away from an offer, when no retaliation comes for taking without giving more in return, Eddie stands them in front of the freezer aisle.

“You pick.” he says. He’s prepared to for an extended stay in front of this door, dressed in an extra jacket and jeans that aren’t one wash from disintegrating. “Any kind you want.”

For a moment, he feels the concurrent streams within their minds change course, running over and into each other in a tidal wave of sensation. Warmth, gentle adoration hits Eddie in the heart like the most wonderful punch to the face. And in that moment, Eddie hates it, hates his brain and his human-ness, hates that he cannot feel Venom’s sense-memory as easily as Venom can exist in his mind.

 ** **That is an awful metaphor,**** Venom says. ** **The ahi, please.****

“You got it, buddy.”

 

3.

It’s been a problem since Eddie was a kid. Waking up, unable to move or speak, choking out a gasp as a creature with red eyes stares at him from the corner of his room. His parents had believed him, taken him to the priest and then the bishop, but it wasn’t until college that the problem was defined, laid out in clear, simple terms.

After the rocket, red eyes slowly turn gray, and it gets a step closer every week or so until it looms over Eddie, motionless on his bed. A massive, clammy tongue slides over his throat, stopping over the nonexistent scar between his lungs. Inside him, Venom stirs.

It is not real, the rational part of Eddie’s brain knows, but that fact does not make the scent of rotten meat any less putrid, nor does it make him feel better when talons scrape across his skin, pausing only when they feel Venom shift under the pressure.

Eddie’s brain _finally_ decides to wake up completely as the claws pierce his flesh, a strangled cry caught in his throat, and he sits up, gasping for air. He presses a hand to his chest, desperate, and Venom pours out, all inky blackness against the city night, and tries to remember how to breathe.

 ** **I am here, Eddie.**** Venom whispers in his ear. Eddie leans into the touch and Venom pulls him in closer, spreading out over Eddie’s back and shoulders in the world’s most comforting not-hug. A tendril flicks on the light, and Eddie flinches when the figure reappears for a split second, crouching in the shadows at the side of his bed. ****It is not real.****

Eddie nods dumbly into Venom’s shoulder, and Venom holds him tighter, knows to cup the back of his head, knows to keep talking, because he is entirely in Eddie’s head even if Eddie isn’t entirely in his. Knows to lie Eddie back down, slowly. Knows to pull the blankets off, can taste the memory of being wrapped up in three other minds and how it’s not exactly being tangled in a blanket, but it feels pretty close when you’re half-asleep.

“Thanks, Venom.”

And Venom presses a kiss against Eddie’s cheek, softer and gentler than Eddie thought he was capable of, teeth scraping harmlessly against soft skin before settling down to rest his head against Eddie’s shoulders.

 

4.

And then it is Eddie being shaken awake with a burst of adrenaline. He snaps awake to the sound of Venom screaming in his ear, accidentally rips the curtains because Venom’s fighting to come out. So Eddie backs them up into the corner, fighting for control of his body. The TV hums in the background, some infomercial Venom thinks is entertaining.

“It’s okay.” Eddie says. “It’s okay.”

He gets a tightness in his chest, the sensation of suffocating as something inside him cracks and Eddie feels _fear,_ cold and sharp in the back of his mouth. Eddie collapses to his knees. His lungs aren’t working,  _nothing’s_ working. There is only Venom, half formed around Eddie’s left arm, clutching his hand hard enough to bruise, screaming for him. At once, Eddie feels like he’s burning, and freezing and starving and suffocating, all at the same time, huddled in a mass on the cold and sterile lab floor--

He comes to a moment later, sitting upright on the couch. The distance between them is thin and unsteady now, but Eddie clings to it like a lifeline. He knows if his mind closes the distance now, it will be _bad,_ a maelstrom of panic and fear, but surely it would be better than this dissonance, the feeling of being out of step with your partner. Your other half.

 ** ** _Eddie._ ****Sorrow punches through and Eddie wraps his arms around his chest.

“It’s okay.” his throat feels raw and sore. “It’s not your fault.”

Then it hits him, and he feels Venom withdrawing, all sharp and prickly with shame.

“It’s you.” Eddie says. “You put it up.”

****I could not hurt you. Never.** **

Eddie isn’t sure if he’s relieved or irritated. He gets up and pours a glass of water, downing it with a single gulp.

“All this time I thought it was _me.”_

****I am sorry, Eddie.** **

“Do you _want_ this?” Eddie snaps, gesturing vaguely to him and their filthy apartment.

 ** **Yes! More than**** ** ** _anything._ ****Venom is agitated now, writhing just under Eddie’s skin. ****I thought you knew that.****

“I could have helped you.” Eddie says. “Like before. Like how you helped me.”

****It is not that simple.** **

“It seems pretty simple to me!”

Venom splatters onto the counter and forms a massive head. Fangs glint in the reflection of the streetlights below. Eddie’s night vision has gotten better, and he hadn’t even realized it until now. He can see Venom clearly, can see the microwave clock turning portions of Venom’s opalescent eyes light green.

****I am not supposed to be like this!** **

“Like what?!”

 ** **A**** ** ** _parasite._ ****Venom spits out the word. ****Useless. Helpless.****

“You are _not_ useless for needing help.” Eddie snaps. “I like you as much as you like me. I __hate__ that I thought I wasn’t meant for you because I couldn’t feel everything you feel.”

Venom is silent, hidden behind the distance between them.

“How long as this been going on?” Eddie asks. “I thought it had gotten better.”

 ** **It did.**** ** _ **You** ****_** ** **thought it did**** ** **,**** Venom admits, and that hurts even worse somehow, because it’s been almost a __year,__ and Venom still doesn’t feel safe enough around Eddie and-- ****I could not disturb your resting period with my distress.****

“Cut the crap,” Eddie says, because he knows a lie when he hears it. “Why?”

 ** **Because I am a loser, Eddie. I cannot adequately maintain control of my sense-memory when you are resting.****  

Eddie reaches up, holding Venom’s head in his hands. He can feel the life thrumming in Venom’s form, running in tandem with his heart.

“We’re _both_ losers, but we’re partners, Venom.” Eddie says. “I knew that when you came back.”

 ** **I know.**** Venom leans into the touch, moves forward until his teeth are grazing Eddie’s lips. ** **You are my loser. Completely and entirely.****

Eddie tilts his head forward, pressing a kiss to Venom’s jaw. Venom forms shoulders, then arms and hands that clutch Eddie’s waist like a lifeline.

“And you are completely and entirely my loser, too. No matter what.”

Eddie closes his eyes and lets Venom lower him to the kitchen floor, feels his tongue brushing against Venom’s, feels the teeth brush against his lips.

**_**_Yes._ ** _ **

5.

Their new meditation CD is in Mandarin. The narrator’s voice is pleasant and patient (or at least Eddie thinks it is, the epithets Mrs. Chen occasionally barks at him carry neither patience nor pleasantry).

He settles on the floor. He feels enough to know Venom is all nerves, a tight ball of tension and anxiety coiled up in the pit of his stomach.

“We don’t have to do this.” Eddie says. “If you’re not ready.”

 ** **I am.**** Venom insists. ****I know…****

“Know what?”

 ** **I know**** ** **_you._**** Venom turns Eddie’s head to the couch, where Venom’s amassed the pile of things Eddie had given him.

“I’m ready to know you.” Eddie whispers. “Completely and entirely.”

 ** **That is not how it works.**** Venom says, and Eddie rolls his eyes. ****Our mind is not like a book. Neither is yours. You will not be able to flip through our memories like you flip through your dead trees.****

Eddie snorts.

“You know what I mean.”

 ** **I do.**** Venom uncoils, all gentle warmth spreading across Eddie’s body.

Something inside Eddie clicks into place. It’s like the first time he tried on glasses when he was ten, the world coming into focus as he saw the faces on his parents and sister, the sharp, slanted lines of words on a page. He can feel the floor beneath him, cheap linoleum that hadn’t been cleaned since he moved in. He can hear the traffic outside, a car honking as someone jaywalks.

And he can feel Venom, an entire universe of light and sensation and __home__ in his body, reaching out to him. Eddie can feel Venom pushing deeper and deeper, past Eddie’s bones and organs. He feels Venom sliding through his body, traveling from his heart to the very tips of his fingers.

Eddie is slowly becoming aware of the individual cells in his body as Venom brushes over them with excruciating tenderness, knitting themselves together, cell by cell.

 _Entirely and completely,_ Eddie says--or thinks? He can’t tell at this point, but he can hear Venom’s laugh, a gentle rumble in his ears.

And then he can’t tell where he ends and Venom begins, but he’s so much bigger than he remembers, stretching from the CD player to the kitchen, a single being of memory and essence. They remember home; the deep red opening to expel them to the cosmos, the first day of school, how they had forgotten their lunchbox in dad’s car, but this time they’re shielded from the fists and the cold void of space. They remember the ship, remember it had been cold; warmer than space but colder than when they left their jacket the restaurant and stepped into the tank. Remember the terror of falling and burning and freezing, and they cling to each other until they emerge from the water unbroken.

He’s not sure how long they remain on the floor. Long enough that the meditation CD finishes. Long enough for the sun to set, for their eyes to track the shadows moving across the ceiling.

“Love you.” Eddie manages, and feels Venom’s response, warmth in his chest and the taste of chocolate on his tongue.

And then Venom speaks, because he knows Eddie likes to hear his voice, and Eddie knows that Venom cares about him so desperately that it hurts to think about it too much.

****Love you, Eddie.** **

* * *

 

+1

Eddie jolts awake. Venom is curled in his lap, trembling and Eddie strokes his symbiote gently, feeling the smooth edges of Venom’s form against his fingers.

The fear and pain roll back, enough for Eddie to pull Venom up into his arms.

“Love you.” Eddie whispers into the dark. Venom mumbles a reply, tucking his head into the crook of Eddie’s neck. They sit quietly for a moment, letting the fear subside into memory, and then Eddie slides off the couch in response to a wordless query, heading to the kitchen to pour tater tots onto a pan. Venom rumbles his appreciation from his spot in Eddie’s arms.

Eddie sips coffee as the food cooks.

The sun is beginning to peek over the horizon when the timer goes off. Venom extends a tendril to grab the pan. At Eddie’s insistence, they wait a minute for it to cool before Venom pours the whole thing into his mouth. Venom settles back into Eddie’s chest as he finishes the coffee.

“You okay?”

 ** **I am,**** Venom says. ****I am with you.****

Eddie chuckles.

“Sap.”

****Loser.** **

He puts the mug in the sink and stretches. Venom settles back into Eddie’s chest, a soft warmth beside his heart.

Together, they watch the sun rise.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! As always, feedback is greatly appreciated.
> 
>  
> 
> Please check out the [Venom Gift Exchange on tumblr! ](https://venomgiftexchange.tumblr.com/)  
> 


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